The "Looks" of a Referral

I ran across an interesting article, written by a woman who has adopted several children from Ethiopia. It describes what a referral typically "looks like" - meaning the information we can expect to receive when first learning about a child potentially matched with us. This is a question we frequently get asked, so I thought it would be worth while to post the article here.

Pictures:

Usually you will get at least a photo or two of your child. Some agencies will also share a short video clip of your child. Don't be too distressed if your child looks sad or confused. An orphanage is a stressful place for a child to be, especially for toddlers and preschoolers.

Medical:

Your child's medical information will most likely include a page or two of notes taken by a doctor at a medical exam. With an infant, you may receive records from several different doctor's visits, so that you can see how the baby has been growing. Sometimes this record will mention immunizations your child has gotten since he or she came into care. Other times you will not get that record until you travel to Addis to pick up your child. Your child will be tested for HIV and hepatitis before his or her referral is offered to your family. If you have any questions about the medical information, make an appointment for a consult with your child's pediatrician or an international adoption specialist.

History:

This section varies greatly from child to child. Some children or their birth family may have been able to tell social workers a fair bit about the child's past.Other times the info is sketchy at best. In the case of an infant who was abandoned, the only thing you may ever know is where and when the child was found. It can be sad to realize that you may never know much about your child's past. But this is a reality for many children being adopted from Ethiopia. Another thing that you should be prepared for is not knowing your child's birthday. Birthdays are just not a big deal in Ethiopia, and in the majority of cases,agency workers guess the child's age and pick a date.If the child does a lot of catch-up growth right after homecoming, and you become convinced that the birth date is very wrong, you can change it at home when you go to court to re finalize your child's adoption in court.